Resisting Grace
When coffee challenges your faith
In typical, forgetful Kristen style, I left my house on Friday without my wallet.
As I waited in the Starbucks drive through line, I instinctively reached for my wallet - but it wasn’t there. Normally that would be no big deal. But I had promised a caramel macchiato to a friend I was meeting in just 20 minutes. I pulled up to the order screen.
“How can I help you?”
“Well, see, I’m just gonna leave. I forgot my wallet. Sorry!”
“What would you like?”
“Uhhhh no. I mean, what? I don’t have my credit card.”
“What can we get started for you? It’s on the house.”
Feeling not quite sure how to proceed, I requested the caramel macchiato for my friend and decided not to order anything for myself. “Anything else?” A quick response from me: “No.” And from there I began to spiral down. Why were they doing this? Did they believe I was sincere? Was I cheating the system? Was I greedy for asking for a $5 drink? I should have refused. If anything, I should have asked for a tall coffee.
“Here you go! Have a great day,” smiled the barista as she handed me my free coffee. I was taken aback by the genuine kindness. She should have been ruder to me. After all, I did just take something without paying for it.
Driving away, emotions in high gear, I reflected on how much I STILL resist grace. No matter how many times I’ve shared the gospel and confirmed in my own heart that I believe it, I still find myself saying “I mean, what, God?” The impulse to earn is so deep in me that even a gift of coffee becomes repulsive. I come from a long line of spiritual do-it-yourselfers (I suspect you do, too).
Jesus once encountered a Gentile woman who wanted ANYTHING of Jesus that she could receive - even the scraps off the table.
21 After going out from there, Jesus went to the region of Tyre and Sidon. 22 A Canaanite woman from that area came and cried out, “Have mercy on me, Lord, Son of David! My daughter is horribly demon-possessed!” 23 But he did not answer her a word. Then his disciples came and begged him, “Send her away, because she keeps on crying out after us.” 24 So he answered, “I was sent only to the lost sheep of the house of Israel.” 25 But she came and bowed down before him and said, “Lord, help me!” 26 “It is not right to take the children’s bread and throw it to the dogs,” he said. 27 “Yes, Lord,” she replied, “but even the dogs eat the crumbs that fall from their masters’ table.” 28 Then Jesus answered her, “Woman, your faith is great! Let what you want be done for you.” And her daughter was healed from that hour. Matt 15:21-27
May God make me more like this woman - desperate for mercy, aware of my need, ready to receive good things from His hand. Even coffee.